And deep inside she felt the aching, just dying to open up, to let it pour from her like rain pours from the tropical sky, but her nerves got the best of her. She swallowed her pride, swallowed it right down to her aching belly where it lay for as long as she could bear it. It was her protection. She wanted to feel invincible, even if it weren't true, even if it could never be true. It made her feel less vulnerable. It made her feel like she could take on the world. And her emotion hid deep inside of her until she'd burst open, spilling her feelings all over the floor, completely vulnerable for just an instant... And it seemed to be enough, but deep down she knew it couldn't possibly continue this way.
She was complicated.
She knew it.
She understood it.
It was who she was.
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